What's that all about?

Electrickery II

So I'm thinking 3 red wires, 3 black wires and this earth wire. Hmmm. How to start. Well how about I start by being a total pillock - that'll make for a good Christmas Eve. First thing first. I have to screw a metal plate to the ceiling. The afore-mentioned wires have to be in the middle of this circular metal plate. (It looks like a big Polo mint only it is silver not white and doesn't taste minty.) So I switch off the electric, put the plate in place, mark where I want to put the screws and then leave it there hangin on the wires.

Of course I then just switched the electric back on. Now the thing with this plate is, it is around the wires. The other thing about it is that it's metal. And the thing about metal is that it conducts electricity. So this plate that I have left hanging off the ceiling is connecting all three reds with all three blacks.

As I threw the switch, I wouldn't say it was a boom, but definately a bang as an almighty flash briefly lit the room before consigning me to darkness. Obviously I've blown the fuse. This was confirmed when the living room lights failed to come on. Before continuing, I obviously changed my pants.

So now its Christmas eve and I'm on my way to the DIY shop. Now that actually did cheer me up. I admit, I am rubbish at Christmas shopping but not so rubbish to leave it until Christmas eve and then raid the DIY as it's the only open shop. I can see her now "Wow darling, how thoughtful. You bought me a set of spanners and some raw plugs. how did you know?"

Anyway, I buy 12 fuses therefore I have 12 goes at getting the wiring right. Times running on so I abandon putting the light up (save that for another day.) All I had to do was arrange the wires so that the flow of electric would not be interrupted and we would have 1 working kitchen light, and the living room lights would work.

So I'm down to 6 fuses by the time I've cracked it.

As we left to go out on Christmas eve I stared admiringly at my new kitchen spotlight that I had managed to fit myself. It was when switching it off blew the fuse again that I was not quite so Christmassy....

the story continues

posted by Toaster @ 8:23 AM